It wasn’t until I began reading the comments after the article that I realized how important these types of studies/articles are. I was struck by how defensive and resistant some of the comment writers were to both Jane’s initial post and her further comment. I wrote a comment as well and have used much of what I wrote there in this post because I think it is worth repeating. So, if you read the comments and some of this sounds familiar…it is.
I asked myself why people were getting so upset by these ideas and I think that when you have grown up veiled in the protection of white privilege you tend to take a naïve view of race. You really, truly in your heart of hearts believe that love will conquer all. If you just love your child enough, he or she will be able to wrap themselves in your white privilege and sail through life cloaked in the security of your love. I know that way back when, I believed that.
Oh, if only it were so. Parenting would be so much easier. Trust me when I say that if I knew then what I know now, there’s a good chance I’d be single and childless and living in a loft in downtown Chicago. Parenting is a ton harder than I ever imagined and the difficulties are only exacerbated when we add race into the mix. There are no easy answers and we all want to do what is best for our kids. Often that means opening our minds and hearts to ideas that we are not comfortable with.
children, 3 dogs, 2 cats and a lizard (who remarkably enough is an
invited guest). She makes her living as an attorney which is useful
as she spends most of her time negotiating with her husband or one of
her children. Kate is also a fledgling blogger at www.thrivingdespiteus.blogspot.com.